Auditions are time consuming and costly. So is driving a car. In my (still-in-progress) memoir I have a chapter about Auditions. I also have a chapter about car issues. This past two weeks I experienced both.

Tuesday morning, August 14th, I received an e-mail asking me to attend an audition the next day in Dallas. Of course I wanted to, but there were so many logistics to arrange. I was supposed to work for a 1/2 day at a potential new part-time day job and Martha had a therapy session scheduled at 11:00. Also, f we took the car out of town, Dorothy would need transportation to and from work.

We made phone calls, worked out arrangements, and almost two hours arranging logistics, I accepted the audition. Tuesday night we packed clothes and food and Wednesday morning at 6:30 we were on our way to Dallas. We took our time and arrived about 12:00. We looked for some place to get water and visit a bathroom, and then scouted out where Martha might wait while I auditioned, then Martha dropped me off.

I arrived at the audition site about 12:30 for my 12:40 audition. I actually went in about 12:50 and at 1:00 I was done and we started home. Again, taking our time we arrived home about 7:45. That’s a lot of arranging plus a 13-hour day for a 10-minute audition.

Logistics 1:45 minutes
Travel Time 12 hours, 15 minutes
Waiting 45 Minutes
Audition 10 Minutes

Whew!

Thursday afternoon I got another audition offer—this time for a movie that would film in October. And this audition was also in Dallas. But this time I had four days to prepare. A good friend of mine was also asked to audition, scheduled just 30 minutes after me, so we decided to drive together.

Monday, after both of us left our respective day jobs, we started north on I-45, riding in the HOV lane to beat the outbound rush hour traffic. We arrived at our hotel—same hotel where the auditions were held—about 10:15 that night. We checked in, planned our audition ensembles, practiced the lines and went to bed. The next morning we were done by 9:45, checked out of the hotel by 10:00 and eating brunch at Lucky’s.

Logistics 30 minutes
Travel Time 5 Hours
Waiting 30 Minutes
Audition 10 Minutes

So much travel for so little audition time.

Just before leaving Lucky’s I glanced at my e-mail. The prior week’s commercial wanted me for a call back the next day—in Dallas. My logistical brain snapped into action: I checked Megabus and Greyhound schedules home the next day, knowing I would also have to get another hotel and figure out where to hang out during the day—working the day job from somebody’s wireless. This wasn’t working. So I called Martha.

“You want to come to Dallas?” I asked.

“You got the commercial call back.”

“Yep.”

I told her my thoughts: she start north, we start south and halfway between the cities, I switch cars and return with Martha to Dallas.

“Let me wrap things up here,” Martha said after a deep breath. “Then I’ll go home, pack and start toward you.”

I called our daughter to let her know what was happening and she’d need to get a ride (or Uber) home that day and to work the next.

Meanwhile, my friend and I started South.

Which is when car troubles began.

Just south of Ennis, TX the left rear tire of my friend’s car blew. The next exit was too far to reach on just a rim, so we baked in the hot Texas summer sun for a little over an hour before AAA came and changed the tire and we were back on the road.

Martha called while we sat there, even heard my friend talking on the phone, though she couldn’t tell what he was saying. I didn’t tell her what had happened. I didn’t want her to stress. I figured I’d wait until she had cleared the Houston area traffic which contained enough stress of its own. As we continued south and when I saw she was north of Conroe, I called and let her know what happened.

Then the car started shaking again, just like it shook as we approached Ennis. So we pulled off to look at the tires. All looked okay, but they weren’t. Between the two Buffalo, TX exits the right rear tire blew. This time help came a little sooner and the man towed us into town to get a replacement tire. He took my friend to an auto repair shop after dropping me off where Martha could meet me close to the highway.

Fortunately the car woes ended there. My friend and audition partner got his tire replaced, made it back to Houston, and the next day got everything back in order.

But the Auditions weren’t done.

Martha and I continued her northbound route and I was headed back to Dallas. We made hotel reservations from the car and arrived about 6:30. We checked in, ate dinner and settled into the room for the night. The next morning I did a lot of day job work before eating breakfast and checking out. I arrived at the audition site about 9:30 for a 10:10 audition and we were back on the road by 11:00 A.M.

No mishaps coming home.

Logistics 15 minutes
Travel Time 13 hours
Waiting 45 Minutes
Audition 10 Minutes

That was a lot of time and money and stress for three 10-minute auditions.

“Hi-diddle-dee-dee
An actor’s life for me.”

I love it!